Dolly Parton: Pretty Little Thing, Larger Than Life

Someone recently asked me why I love Dolly Parton so much. I couldn’t string enough words together to explain to them why I’m so passionate about her and why they should love her as much as I do.

She’s fearless, loving, compassionate, hardworking, a pioneer for gender equality, an aunt, a friend, mother, sister, and grandmother to us all. She is an icon, the queen of songwriting, president of the United States of Dolly, leader of Dollyism, and one of the most incredible human beings.

In essence, she’s Dolly.

She embraces everyone, all walks of life, and through her lyrics, she makes people feel seen and heard. I don’t think there is a Dolly Parton song that people can’t relate to — from Jolene to 9 to 5 to I Will Always Love You. Even the ones she didn’t write are songs that I believe she knew would speak to people (and be big hits – she’s a businesswoman after all).

When I think back to when my love of Dolly began, it had to be Steel Magnolias. I grew up watching that movie with my grandma, mom, and sister. It was the first film I can remember seeing Dolly in. I loved her as the beauty shop owner, Truvy Jones.

I’ve learned that there are many things that I didn’t know were inspired or written by her. So, like any good fan, I’ve gone on to listen to all her songs, watch most of her movies (I won’t claim to have seen everything, but I try). I also watch any documentary about her, anything with her name on it (thanks Nextflix for all the Dolly Parton specials), as well as read articles and books about her. If you haven’t watched the documentary Here I Am on Netflix, you should. I think you’ll join the Dolly Parton fan club.

There is one movie/book that only mentions Dolly, but I think it shows you how she’s impacted the world. Dumplin is a movie I related to on many levels. Dolly doesn’t star or make a cameo in the film, but her influence is there in a big way. It embodies what Dolly is always saying about people and herself. “It’s okay to be different,” she says in Here I am. “It’s okay to not be like everybody else. In fact, it’s not only not okay; it’s wonderful that you are who you are.”

I could go on for days about Dolly, but here’s a few quick reasons I love her:

She gives back in multiple ways.
She may be a bit artificial on the outside, but she’s a real person on the inside.
Dolly is hands down one of the best songwriters of all time.
Her lyrics can randomly move you to tears or bring a smile to your face.
She’s whoever/whatever you need her to be, but not in a fake way. It’s about inclusion.
She may be tiny, but she’s got a big heart and personality.
Dolly isn’t a one-trick pony…”She wanders in everyone’s lane and pulls it off.”
She never gives up.
OG influencer.
Humble.
Pioneer.
Feminist.
Inspirational.
Did I mention she’s spectacular?

I genuinely believe there isn’t anyone in the world that couldn’t like Dolly Parton, and if they exist, which I’m sure they do, they’re missing out.

Still not convinced Dolly is a gift to us? Check out this article from The New Yorker and this piece from Mental Floss.

Thank you, Dolly Parton, for sharing yourself with the world. ❤

A Scary Tale: Drip, Drop

This is a repost of a short story I wrote based on an urban legend (the licked hand). I thought it’d be fun to bring it back for Halloween.

Drip. Drop. Drip. Drop.

The sound was all Samantha Wates could focus on tucked tightly into her bed. It was nearly midnight, and she’d only been asleep for an hour before she heard the faucet dripping.

Sam’s parents had left around 9 p.m. for a night out in the city, and they wouldn’t be home for hours. She dangled her arm off the bed until she felt her dog, Rupert, lick her hand. His favorite sleeping place was underneath her bed.

Sam liked to think that even though she was fifteen and didn’t believe in monsters, her dog was still protecting her from anything that went bump in the night.

“That’s a good boy, Rupert. Now, go turn off the leaking faucet.” She giggled to herself, knowing without opposable thumbs that it was impossible for a dog. “Alright, I’ll do it myself.”

She sprang from the bed. The winter chill made the hardwood floors like ice. She ran on her tiptoes out her door and across the hall to the bathroom. She turned both knobs tightly before jetting back to bed.

She snuggled in, trying to dismiss the cold in her feet and the prickling feeling at the back of her neck. She covered herself from head to toe with the bulky comforter but had let her hand hang down for Rupert to lick again. It was calming to know he was there, and sleep quickly took over.

Drip. Drop. Drip. Drop.

“Uh. Not again.” She mumbled to herself while glancing at the glowing red numbers on the bedside clock. She didn’t want to get up again. The late hour had made the room colder.

Sam got up anyway. She crossed the hall and started to reach for the faucet, but realized the sound wasn’t coming from the sink. It was coming from the bathtub.

She hesitated before moving the shower curtain back. Sam flicked the switch, and blinding light filled the bathroom. Squinting, she yanked back the curtain.

Her eyes widen as she slammed back into the counter, practically falling into the sink. The air was escaping her lungs faster than it was coming in. Black spots appeared in her vision before she remembered how to work her lungs.

Gulping in air, she stared at the blood matted hair and mangled body of her beloved dog. Rupert hung from the shower nozzle. His blood was dripping into the tub, pinging on the metal drain.

Drip. Drop. Drip. Drop.

Choking back tears, she edged toward the door but froze when she saw something written on the wall. Scrawled in blood across the tile were the words, “Humans can lick, too.”

Goosebumps had covered her flesh as her eyes touched on the words, and a dark form appeared behind her. An arm snaked around her waist, and another covered her mouth to silence her screams.

As Sam was dragged into the dark hall, she felt a familiar thick, wet tongue slide up her neck before she heard him whisper hotly into her ear, “Mmmmm, tasty.”

#Alive relatable to life in 2020?

The movie, #Alive, shows how easily a virus can become a pandemic and probably describes how many people felt sheltering in place in early 2020. I never thought zombie movies would be relatable to real life, but no one could predict this year.

***Spoilers ahead***

The rundown
It’s a classic story of boy meets girl. Oh, and there is a virus spreading rapidly throughout Seoul, causing people to eat other people. It begins with a young man, Joon-woo, locked in his apartment with few supplies and a sticky note reminding him he must survive. In the beginning, he has water, electricity, and social media to connect to the outside world but no cell service to call. As the days go on, everything gets cut off. He’s desperate, alone, and has a date with a noose. In the act of trying to kill himself, he receives a sign that he isn’t alone. A young woman across the complex with a slew of survival gear and a spiked chair that would make Buffy the vampire slayer jealous teams up with our main man, Joon-woo, to stay #alive.

Why is it a bad/good horror movie?

I don’t think this is a great horror movie, but it was entertaining enough. I wouldn’t say this film is scary, but the faint of heart might find it a little more suspenseful than I did. I think the filmmakers did a superb job of drawing you into the characters and making you want them to survive. In the end, there is a moment that you believe it is over for this duo, and you don’t want that for them. They don’t deserve to die on the rooftop ripped to shreds by the zombies. If you care enough about the characters, I don’t think it can be called a bad horror movie. It had some cheese, but sometimes that’s a good thing.

The creepiest/best/cheesiest scene or quote?

One of the cheesiest scenes is when a fireman zombie, using a thin rope that probably wouldn’t hold the weight of anyone dead or alive, starts climbing up to Yoo-bin’s apartment. Joon-woo attempts to save the day by using his drone to try to fight the zombie. Yep, you read that correctly. To add to the “suspense” of the moment, Joon-woo also has zombies “knocking” at his door. Yoo-bin is unconscious on the floor but comes to just in time to cut the hand off the fireman zombie, and he falls to his final death. The zombies also stopped trying to get into Joon-woo’s apartment for whatever reason.

One other scene that made me chuckle involved Joon-woo and Yoo-bin are waiting for the elevator with a hoard of zombies just outside the glass doors. I’m sure they are panicked, but they looked too casual to me.

Who won the movie?

Kim Yoo-bin – the girl across the complex: She’s a survivor and helps Joon-woo several times. He fails to “save” her from the fireman zombie, but she’s a strong female who saves herself (not saying that she didn’t need help other times). She’s also a believable actress and character. I love it when she fights off the barrage of zombies to get to Joon-woo’s apartment. Shes’ all-around badass. Toward the end, she disappoints me briefly when she suggests they should kill themselves while they’re still human.

3 Good Things & 3 Bad Things

I thought the zombies were believable with the milky eyes, bloody wounds, and movement. I had a tough time deciding how to classify these zombies, but I’d say they’re a cross between the Walkers in The Walking Dead and the zombies from 28 Days Later. If you didn’t know there are different types of zombies, I leave you with this: https://zombie.fandom.com/wiki/Types_of_Zombies
I loved that Yoo-bin’s plant stole the limelight. I hope it survives.
Even though this movie wasn’t the best I’ve ever seen, it still deserves to be seen.
A few things didn’t make things believable or took you out of the story because you were questioning it.
The close up of Joon-woo eating noodles grossed me out more than the zombies.
I wish you would’ve known what happen to Joon-woo’s family. The English translation just said messages. I have to assume they survived because he smiled.

Netflix’s Ratched Is Worth the Binge

The rundown (no spoilers)

Fans of Ryan Murphy’s work (Popular, Nip/Tuck, American Horror Story) will love this binge-worthy show. The series is set in 1947 and follows Mildred Ratched (Sarah Paulson, AHS), who begins working as a nurse at a leading psychiatric hospital in California. Ratched is a classic onion — each episode, a new layer is revealed about her past or her character. It is hard to decide if Ratched is helpful/caring or as mental as the hospital’s patients. The answer…she is a perfect mix of both. I swear the song Sweet but Psycho was written about Mildred Ratched. There are only eight episodes, so be prepared to be left in the dust, wondering what will happen next season.

The good, the bad, the ugly — mostly good

I love how the all-star leading ladies steal the show and are the main focus. Sharon Stone is still fire.
The show may be set decades in the past, but it still has relevant topics we face today, like women’s issues/women in power, LGBTQA+, and a lack of good mental health care. It makes you realize why state mental institutions are a thing of the past, and there still aren’t enough resources today for those who need help.
It feels like Sarah Paulson is a cross between characters Lana Winters and Sister Jude Martin from AHS: Asylum. She killed it at bringing Mildred Ratched to life, but I felt like I was watching another season of AHS, which I love. It would’ve been nice for it to not feel SO much like AHS. Several AHS alums star or make an appearance in the show, plus the set vibe and attire screamed AHS to me. Don’t misunderstand; I binged watched this show and think it is worth your time.

Showstopper

Sophie Okonedo as Charlotte Wells — you’ll see why — She’s AMAZING and probably my favorite character.

I also have to shout out Joseph Marcell, aka Geoffrey from The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, who plays Len Bronley, a man who forgets his lines and thinks a lobotomy will fix things.

Hiatus

WOW! I was gone for a LONG TIME. I think I might be back.

Sometimes you need a break and it isn’t like I have loads of followers. However, for you who do follow me and read my posts…THANK YOU.

-AMS

Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle

When I heard about the new Jumanji movie, my 10-year-old inner child screamed in horror at the thought of a remake of one of my beloved childhood movies.

How dare “they” try to bring another movie from my early years to the big screen AGAIN. I was a little judgy about it, but my grandma, who has a major crush on Dwayne Johnson, wanted to see it. I sucked it up and took her to the theater.

To my surprise, I actually liked it (I had similar feelings/thoughts about the remake of IT). There are MAJOR differences from the original and I think that is a huge part of why I enjoyed it. (SPOILERS…sort of) The film goes from two kids/two adults to four kids who change to four adults and one Nick Jonas who later is Colin Hanks, from board game to video game, from the game coming out into the real world to the characters going into the game world. Definitely different.

Homage was paid to the original film with a shout out to “Alan Parrish,” which won some points from me. If they would’ve made the movie more like the original, I immediately thought Finn Wolfhard (Mike Wheeler: Stranger Things) should be young Alan. Alas, they didn’t and I’m okay with the casting. Again, surprised like so many others.

Dwayne Johnson, who I still call “The Rock,” is mediocre, but seriously addicting to watch (he’s way better than his first role in The Mummy Returns). He’s also funny in his own way (see Bay Watch as another example – it’s like a car wreck, you can’t help but stare). Sprinkle in Kevin Hart, who has previous film chemistry with Johnson and is hilarious; Jack Black, who is perfect in his role as a teenage girl stuck in “an old white guy’s body;” and the beautiful and talented Karen Gillan, who is a total badass (might be a little biased because Amy Pond is my favorite Doctor Who companion).

I have to give props to the creators. I was either smirking or laughing through most of the movie, as was the rest of the theater (probably more so because I’m a tough audience). My advice is to go into the movie knowing it is an action comedy that isn’t like the 1995 Jumanji with Robin Williams, who can NEVER be replaced. It almost feels like the creators knew that and took the story into a more modern direction that would have the next generation loving it. I also like to think that the tribute to “Alan” was a tribute to Williams (hey I can dream). I find remakes often include a sentimental salute to the originals to help us cope with the changes to the film.

Go see it, and maybe you’ll join me and the many others who are bewildered by the fact that we actually liked this movie.

Disclaimer: I am not a film expert or critic. I leave that up to the professionals, but I hope you take my thoughts into consideration when trying to figure out what to see in theaters this weekend. The movie is a fun, light-hearted piece that is definitely more suited for ages 13 or up (there is some adult humor).

-AMS

Plus+ Girl

I recently saw an article and several posts about body shaming. I initially started this post to talk about my weight loss and more of my own personal journey, but I also wanted to mention the hub about body shaming. Unfortunately, it goes both ways. There is skinny-shaming and fat-shaming happening on a daily basis. Neither of which are okay. Any shaming shouldn’t be acceptable.

The article I read was about comedian Amy Schumer supposedly thin-shaming mega superstar Taylor Swift. Fans were in a tizzy about it. I don’t care about who was making fun of who or if that what was happening. It was the reality that we live in a society that thinks it is okay to body-shame. Fans on both sides were doing so in comments that they made. I don’t believe that it will ever go away. Recently, I was at my third job, which happens to be a women’s plus-size clothing store, and I had a customer who was talking about the “stick-figures” who shop and work at Victoria’s Secret. While I understand where she was coming from, at that moment, she was body shaming. She was putting down the women who can wear the undergarments and clothing from Victoria’s Secret and for what purpose? I had a nice discussion with her about how I thought there was nothing wrong with any woman’s or person’s body, but there was an issue with how clothes were made. Some stores make you feel like the biggest cow while others have you swimming in the same size. It ‘d be nice if there were truly a universal size in clothes. I did my best to steer the customer away from body shaming because it made me uncomfortable.

I spend most of my shifts talking to women about their bodies. I try to remind them no one’s body is perfect, and they look great wearing the green polka dot shirt with navy blue pants. Confidence: that’s all any of us needs. Whether we are fat or thin, round or square, blue or purple, we should be able to be how we want to be.

I say love the body you’re in. Do whatever the hell you want with it because it is never going to be good enough for anyone else. You will never be tall enough, thin enough, athletic enough, or busty enough for anybody. You are the only person that matters when it comes to your body. Trust me, I’m never good enough. My fat friends think I’m gym obsessed because I have chosen to eat healthy and visit the gym six days a week. On the other side, my thin friends readily agree I could stand to shed a few more pounds or offer me carrot sticks when I want a cheeseburger. (Note: I’m generalizing, but not ALL my friends feel this way so friends of mine don’t be offended). Don’t get me wrong, I am harder on myself than anyone else will ever be.

In May 2014, I started on a journey to lose weight. I did not want to be in my 30s and be morbidly obese. I weighed 274 pounds. I wanted to do more physically and be healthier. My journey has been long, and it isn’t over. I’m pushing myself more physically and seeing results. I didn’t want to do a flash diet or lose my weight quickly only to gain it back just as fast. This truly was about changing me and my lifestyle.

This article is not about fat shaming or telling people how to live their life. Losing weight did not cure my knee problems or magically make my back problems go away. I will say I have less pain most days and don’t have the same issues like a back spasm or constant leg pain. I don’t want any plus-size women to read this and feel bad about themselves. We are all beautiful in our ways, and we make choices about our bodies as we see fit. I mainly hope my story will be an inspiration.

Since I started my journey, I have lost more than 60 pounds and gained muscle and healthy habits (for the most part). That’s as much as the weight of a small child. My ultimate goal is to shed 100 pounds and be in fantastic shape. I still have some pounds to go and lots of toning, which I am doing as I try to lose the weight. I am frequently asked how I lost the bulk of my weight. People usually don’t like my answer because it is a lot of work to do what I did and continue to do. I have lost my weight naturally. I have not done surgery or taken diet pills to get me where I am today. If that is what works for you, great. That’s what you’re supposed to do; do what is best for you. I, on the other hand, spend five to six days a week at the gym. I am there anywhere from one hour to three hours. The amount of time I spend at the gym depends on the kind of day I had, my mood or if I have plans. I love it, and it is what is best for me. Not only do I feel healthier physically, but I also feel better mentally and emotionally.

I came up with a sort of motto or way of living my life. I call it the three Ds. Dedication. Discipline. Diet. It has become my “go-to” response for how I lost weight. I tell people: “Shedding pounds and being healthy requires commitment or dedication. You have to go to the gym or for a walk and stay focused on your goal. You have to change your diet and make better food choices.” These were all things I didn’t have the numerous times I had previously tried to lose weight. I would get rid of 20 pounds, plateau, get frustrated, eat a donut (side note: the word nerd in me died a little not to spell out doughnut) and quickly gain the 20 pounds back. Something happened to me in early 2014 to snap me awake and make me realize I wanted a better version of myself. I was reminded of a quote that I heard once by Tony Robbins, “Change happens when the pain of staying the same is greater than the pain of change.” When I first heard that quote, I cried and then again when I later realized I’d reached that point. It inspired me. I didn’t want to be the way that I was anymore. I was a size 22 and growing. I wasn’t happy nor was I living the life I wanted to live. I wanted to be active and play tennis. While I still don’t play tennis, I discovered other activities that interest me more like rowing, running, cycling and kayaking.

We should all be comfortable in our bodies and if there are things about yourself that you don’t like you can change it. I changed and continue to better myself in all ways that I can.

The fact is, no matter what your size, accept and love the body you have been given.

Saying Goodbye

This is it. The end of an era (at least for me). This summer, I will say goodbye to my 20s and hello to my 30s. I got to thinking about how different I was 10 years ago and what I’ve learned, what I’ve experienced and how I’ve changed over the last decade. There is an emphasis on leaving your 20s behind, but I don’t see it as a negative. I look forward to my 30s and all that life has to offer. I still feel young, maybe not 20-years-old young, but still young enough. I have many more milestones and so much life ahead of me (that is if I don’t die prematurely…just kidding). In honor of the next decade, I thought I’d share 29 life lessons I’ve learned so far that that might be useful or nice reminders to others. Here they are:

1. Live each day as it were your last.
2. Music is everything. Dance to it, sing to it and live to it.
3. Travel as much as you can while you can.
4. Live your life for you and only you (sometimes think about other people, but don’t let it rule you).
5. Love without regret even if it hurts later.
6. It’s okay to make mistakes.
7. No matter how old you get you still don’t have everything figured out and you may never.
8. Knowledge is power. Never stop learning.
9. Trust yourself. You know what is best for you.
10. Read as many books as you can get your hands on.
11. Don’t take any wooden nickels (thanks grandma)!
12. Eat a cupcake just because you want it.
13. Road trips are always epic with best friends in tow.
14. Listen to life advice from a child. Sometimes it is that simple.
15. Change is hard, but keep your head up, keep swimming and you’ll make it.
16. Celebrate the little accomplishments along with the big.
17. Always say “please” and “thank you.”
18. Answer: To get to the other side.
19. Jumping out of an airplane is quite fun. You should try it.
20. Friends are your family, too.
21. Take care of your body because you are only getting older.
22. Have no regrets and take chances even if you’re afraid.
23. Say “I love you” when you mean it and always say it to loved ones because you never know when it’s your last goodbye.
24. Be kind to other people.
25. Coffee. Coffee. Tea. Coffee.
26. The mouse gets the cheese.
27. You are guaranteed to experience death, disappointments and dicks (aka assholes) in your life.
28. The movie is never as good as the book.
29. Cherish even the small moments because life is short.

Until next time.

-AM

It’s in the Details

I have a byline in the June issue of Oklahoma Magazine. Check out Page 79 to read about preparing for your wedding day.

Everything is Awesome…When You’re Part of a Team

Getting together with friends and drinking a glass of wine is always fun. It is even better to get together and have a bottle of wine (maybe two) and create an awesome project. This is something I recently did with my friend, Mrs. Stewart.

Mrs. Stewart and I wanted to craft something easy, inexpensive and fun. After doing a quick online search for “Dollar Store” craft ideas, I packed my traveling craft trunk with what supplies I had on hand and made a trip to the local dollar store. I decided to make a tiered tray for either cup cakes or snacks (like veggies, fruits or cheeses). I love to entertain guests so this was the perfect fit for me.

When we arrived at the dollar store, we couldn’t find exactly what we were looking for to build the tray, but we made do with what we could find. It was a blast figuring out what was going to look best. I think we were both surprised by the end result.

Below are the steps to create your own tiered tray. Remember the key to a successful craft project is to relax and have fun. The project shouldn’t feel like a chore or something that you have to get done. Creating something from nothing can be a great stress reliever (especially if wine or beer is involved — for those 21 and up, of course).

Supplies:

Spray Paint (on hand or $3)
Super Glue (on hand or $1) or hot glue gun (on hand or $3)
Clear acrylic platters or plates (on hand or $1 each)
Plastic Margarita cups (on hand or $1 each) Note: You can use whatever you want between each tier. Let the creativity flow!
Alcoholic beverage of your choice (optional)

Step One:
Fill a glass with wine and take two drinks (recommended, but optional).

Step Two:
Lay out your acrylic platters or plates on a surface or area you don’t mind getting paint on. You don’t have to use spray paint. You can use any acrylic-based paint and brush it on.

Step Three:
Paint the platters/plates your desired color. I went with white. If you choose to brush paint, be aware you might be able to see brush lines. Some people don’t like that, so I recommend using a sponge or something to blot the paint onto the platters/plates. Don’t forget to drink your wine.

Step Four:
While your platters/plates are drying, drink more wine (or beer or whatever) and engage in conversation.

Step Five:
After the paint has dried, you can glue the tiers together. (Sorry [not sorry] there is no photo. At this point the wine was doing its job and I was having too much fun to photograph the gluing process, which wasn’t that interesting). You can either use super glue or a hot glue gun. I went with the hot glue gun because I’m notorious for getting super glue all over my hands.

Step Six:
Look upon your masterpiece with pride (and tell the inner perfectionist to ignore the fact that the second tier is crooked…hey nobody is perfect and it could be the wine). To hide the glue and the top edge of the margarita cups you can either glue ribbon or beads to give it a seamless finish (I chose not to do this that night, but I may add beads at a later date).

Step Seven:
Finish the wine. I’ll admit, at one point I wanted to give up and just enjoy the wine, but I resisted and am pleased with my craft project. If you do try this particular craft, I hope you have as much fun as I did.

My wonderfully awesome friend actually finished two projects in the time that I completed mine. She created bookends and a chalkboard plate for her grocery list. Look for her project how-tos on her blog at becomingmrsstewart.com. She has some great tips and ideas for home improvement, weddings, travel, and more.